i was prayin with my peeps the other night, and i was just askin god to speak. i really just wanted a word from him. i really didn't wanna go through the motions, ya know, i just wanted to hear god and say what he put on my heart to say to him. i wanted it to be real, natural, organic, conversational, all that. well, he kept refreshing in my mind this song 'put on'- young jeezy ft. kanye west. and it was just the chorus, '... i put on for my city, on, on for my city...'. i was just vibin with it and then i'd be all oh yeah, i'm praying, hey, god, i wanna hear ya and then it would be all '... i put on for my city...'; it went like that for 20 mins. it was almost as if i was feeling guilty about having a song in my head during 'prayer time' and i was kinda asking god to speak out of obligation, not really a desire to hear from him, but i did desire to hear from him, its weird like that sometimes. well, the song wouldn't leave and thats when god made it click. thats what he was telling me; he wanted me to put on for my city, on, on for my city.
so, the song itself is talking mainly about 2 things: reppin' for where you're from and flossin what you got. in other words, jeezy was saying, 'hey world, i'm from the dirrty, dirrty; the dirrty is great and hey, world (including the dirrty, although, i would claim that the 602 is the real dirrty south, but i digress) look at how amazing i am and how much money i got.' but god was tellin me rep for your city --> pray for your city, intercede for your city, bless your city, pour time into your city, gospel your city, claim your city, put on for your city and floss what you got --> show off jesus, really wear your 'jesus piece', proclaim jesus boldly and accurately, put on for your city. the verses that came to mind were matt. 5:13-16 and as i was reading them, i was totally thinkin, 'put on for your city, on, on for your city'.
see, even in my desire to hear from god i was making a costly mistake. i was presupposing that if god were to speak, it would be in some crazy 'spiritual' way. even though i really did want to hear god, i think part of my motivation was wanting some prescribed spiritual experience as a type of pick-me-up. how ghastly and evil that i would approach his throne that way and totally trample on the priviledge it is that the all-powerful god would even hear us let alone give us himself! i was forgetting a truth that i so fervently believe that god uses all things to glorify himself. i was forgetting that god ultimately pursues us, we don't ultimately pursue him. i was forgetting that all throughout history god has spoken in ways that his children can hear. i was forgetting that i am a sheep of the great shepherd and the great shepherd speaks to me in a way that i hear, namely, through music. in my experience, god usually talks to me in loud ways; not while i'm kumbaya-ing out in the forest, with the dandelions. if you're a kumbaya-er, praise god, it just aint me. i'm a club banger hearer of god. i hear god best in the noise, in the flow of life. god usually tickle my ear with sweet whispers, he drops it like its hot. more and more that i actually hear god, the more and more i'm convinced that i gotta do me, i can't expect to do what i would think it should be because it works for other people. praise god for the diversity of his people and the gajillion ways that he speaks, may we have ears to hear!
pursue hearing god. check your motivations. be open to finding out 'how' you hear god (granted, it prolly won't look the same everytime, but over a broad history, there will prolly be some trends). grind what you hear through the word of god; if it contradicts scripture, then you heard wrong. if there's some one you know who hears god often/well, ask 'em to teach you some schnazz. we have a great resource in jesus, why do we so often try to reinvent the wheel! jesus' got this, simmer down!
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p.s. heres the song, if you want some context.
p.p.s. what are some ways that god speaks to you? i'm always interested in seeing peep's process for hearing/discerning god, so whats yours? do you wanna hear god? please comment with your answer.
11:43 PM
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I think I hear God best when I'm writing. I'll read a passage of scripture and not really take anything from it. Maybe there was part or two of the passage that stood out to me. Sort of like the section is saying, "Hey! Investigate me! There's something to learn here!" but I won't really know what it is that I might learn. Then I'll start writing my thoughts down to work through the passage and I almost always find myself going down a trail of thoughts and clarifications and reminders and epiphanies that had never occured to me when I was just trying to mull over the passage in my head.
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